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  • [河北福彩排列7走势图] [手机访问]

    阿P唬鱼

    时间:2019-05-24 09:26来源:网络整理 作者: 爱癌

    河北福彩排列7走势图 www.kxrqd.com   在东北一些地方,有一种捕鱼的工具,叫“唬子”,形状像网箩……

      这天是周日,阿P闲来无事,就去江边溜达。沿江一路走下去,阿P发现捕鱼的人很多,有钓鱼的,有撒网的,还有唬鱼的。

      阿P逐一看过去,顿时乐了,那个唬鱼的傻大个姿势笨拙,甩不远不说,抛出去的唬子还没落水就翻个了,他也不管,照样让唬子沉下水,没多一会儿就收绳子,拽唬子上岸,里面一条鱼也没有!

      这哪成啊?阿P急得手直痒,网上一句话说得好——“孔子解决不了的问题老子给你解决”,他阿P唬鱼可算是行家里手,就算给他一个没鱼的地方,也能刮一层水底的淤泥,弄几只螃蟹出来,眼下这个大个子差劲得很,得帮帮他!

      阿P走上前去,自报家门,接着就说起唬鱼经来,听得大个子连连点头,最后,他把唬子连同绳子递给阿P:“大哥,你真厉害,你来帮我做个示范吧。”

      这工夫,已经有人围观了,都想看看老手是咋唬鱼的。

      阿P当然乐意,他接过唬子放了些鱼饵,后退一步:“兄弟,看好了,要扎稳马步,扭身……甩胳膊……要大弧度……走!”话音刚落,唬子从阿P的手里脱手而出,划着弧形曲线,落在很远的水面上,慢慢沉入水中……

      阿P感觉没丢面子,动作娴熟,堪称完美,加上唬子里放足了鱼饵,自己的力道让唬子落在深水区域,弄不上鱼才怪呢!阿P正洋洋得意,扭头一看,见大家都在奇怪地瞧他,便问大个子:“咋啦?哪里做得不对吗?”

      大个子傻傻地咽了口唾沫:“一会儿你、你咋把唬子拉上来?”

      阿P一听顿时大惊失色,刚才为了动作好看,抛得远,他竟没拉住绳子,唬子连同绳子一块儿扔出去了!顿时,阿P面红耳赤,抬头搜索,最末端的绳头还看得見,正随着江流飘荡,离岸边越来越远。阿P急了,眼下最要紧的是找一个工具,把唬子弄上来。他抬头一看,见江堤上有个胖子在用两根鱼竿钓鱼,还有一根鱼竿放在石头上闲着,他立刻冲过去,说明来意。

      胖子犹豫了一下:“可别给我弄坏了,我这鱼竿贵着呢。”

      阿P连连道谢,??缸庞愀头杀蓟乩?,在绳子消失的位置甩了几次,最后鱼钩一紧,阿P乐了:“看你往哪跑!”可是,鱼竿弯了也没拉动,他再一用力,绷紧的鱼线突然一松,他快速收线,线轴摇着摇着,阿P变了脸色,别说线了,就连线上的几个鱼钩都没了!

      这时,胖子不放心,也来了,他看到鱼线飘荡在空中,脸色难看地拍了拍阿P的肩膀,说:“哥们,你知道我上面四个鱼钩值多少钱吗?都是进口的啊,每个200块,就被你这么几下……你说咋办?”

      阿P傻了眼,那个甩丢的唬子没几个钱,10块、8块市场上有的是,可胖子这鱼钩……阿P正在犯难,胖子掏出一张纸递给阿P:“看仔细喽,昨天刚在渔具店买的,这是买鱼钩的发票!”

      本来就心虚,见到白纸黑字,阿P彻底吓傻了,他口袋里只有50块钱,是小兰给的半月零花钱,怎么办呢?没办法,阿P用身份证做抵押,再三说明天带钱赎回身份证,胖子无奈,只能这样了。

      阿P恼火地看着江面,都是那个唬子惹的祸,非把它捞上来不可,他得拿这个唬子跟小兰交代“犯罪”经过,不然小兰绝不会替他还债的。想到这里,阿P哀求胖子再借一下鱼竿,他在鱼线上系了块小石头甩了出去,费了好大的劲,那个唬子的绳子总算被捞上来了。

      唬子刚出水面,就听见“噼里啪啦”的,浪花声很响,脸盆大小的唬子里,居然装了一半的鱼,足有五六斤!阿P乐了,拿过大个子的塑料袋倒了进去,人们争相观看……

      看完鱼,胖子紧张地拉住阿P,把身份证递给他:“你的身份证我不要了,只要你把鱼给我,咱就两清了,你看咋样?”

      阿P吃惊了,往多了算,这鱼每斤市场价4块钱,五斤才20块,他肯抹掉四个鱼钩800块钱?

      见阿P不相信,胖子竟把身份证塞进阿P口袋里,扒拉开人群,拎起那袋鱼就要走。阿P说不出哪里不对劲,但直觉就是不对劲,他一把拉住胖子:“我现在可是左脑全是水,右脑全是面粉,不动便罢了,一动全是糨糊,我就搞不明白了,你这是唱的哪出?”说着,他把鱼袋子夺了过来。

      胖子无奈,只好说,里面有一条巴掌大小的中华鲟,他只买那一条!阿P吃了一惊,打开袋子扒拉着:“真的假的?是哪条啊?”

      胖子一指:“这条就是,刚才我一眼就瞧见了,给个痛快话,行不行?”

      阿P脖子一梗,说啥也不给了。

      胖子一把抢过袋子,说,这唬子是大个子的,唬到的鱼自然也是他的。阿P一听,问大个子这鱼到底是谁的,没想到大个子看了看两人,转身从胖子手中夺过袋子,说:“鱼是我的!”

      人群顿时议论纷纷,说啥的都有。胖子眼睛一亮,要跟大个子交易,出价200块!突然,阿P想起什么,走出人群给小兰打电话,很快,阿P回来了,两人还在谈论价格,他大喊一声:“我出300!”

      大个子愣了,看着两人:“这么小的鱼,你俩买它干啥呀?”

      胖子说老婆身体不好,买回去给老婆炖汤补身子;而阿P说那是濒危鱼种,买来放生。

      大个子犹豫了,不知该卖给谁。

      两人一看,顿时竞价起来,一路飙升,最后,阿P喊:“我出800!”胖子也不示弱:“我出1000!”大个子一举手:“800成交,卖给阿P先生了!”

      胖子气急败坏地嚷道:“没听清楚?我出的是1000!”

      大个子把袋子交给阿P,回头对胖子说:“你出1000不好使,我就喜欢800这个数儿!”

      胖子指着大个子,说:“你傻呀?他买回去不是养着玩就是炖着吃了,说放生你就信?那你让他放啊!”

      阿P见人们都盯着他,便一挺胸脯走到江边,“哗啦”一下,把袋子里的鱼全部倒进江里。

      人群安静了一会儿,顿时掌声雷动,为阿P喝彩!

      胖子见买鱼无望,对大个子说:“你让他给钱啊,看他有没有钱给你!”阿P一听,顿时矮了半截,没想到大个子却握住了阿P的手:“我早看出你是个好人,钱,我根本没打算要!”

      阿P很感激,见胖子讪讪要走,拦住他说了个秘密:那条中华鲟很可能不是野生的,因为他想起小兰前几天说过,她有个富婆闺蜜,买来好多挺贵的鱼放生,他打电话回去一问,其中就有养殖的中华鲟,否则,极少面世的野生鲟鱼怎么可能被小小的唬子打捞上来?

      胖子一听,有些不明白:“那你还愿意花那么多钱?”

      阿P自豪地说:“养殖的鱼放到大自然里,产卵后第二代,就有野生的特点了,再过几年都是野生的了,这和东北虎放生是一个道理,我们都要?;さ?”

      胖子似乎被阿P说动了,他拍了拍阿P的肩,说:“刚才对不住了,我也告诉你一个秘密……”

      原来,胖子老婆管钱,为了从老婆手里多抠点钱喝酒,胖子才让渔具店多写了发票金额,鱼钩实际上才十几块钱……

      阿P一听,顿时轻松地吐出了一口长气,再一看,见大个子拎着唬子走到水边,正要接着唬鱼,他连忙喊道:“我来我来,唬鱼我是行家里手!”

    Tags: 阿P故事

    本文网址://www.kxrqd.com/youmo/155811.html (手机阅读)

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